Tuesday, August 14, 2012

a little boy bringing on a little bit of struggle

photo by unkle mar-mar

after these past two days i can't believe that my hair is on my head. i have had two days full of screaming and crying. i have had my patience tested, and i think i missed placed it. i prayed throughout my frustration, but for some reason it didn't work the whole time. i have been comforted all day today by friends and family saying supportive things... and one little line that stuck out the most was "everyone has stressful things in their lives at least ur stress comes from a beautiful baby boy that loves you." (things could be worse) and want to know the funny part... the stress didn't start until a little bit after i got off a phone call with my friend valerie yesterday. she told me "you're such a happy mom. when laken is fussy you're just so calm and cheerful." wellllll... that was because i had my mind set that he is only a 3 month old little guy and he needs help soothing himself and just needs to feel the love of his momma. the circumstances are that he just has me. i am the only one he is around 80% of his days, and he is used to me... if i don't do it, who will? i was looking all day for my sign, for my peace from God and I heard it on the radio. "God has a purpose for your pain, a reason for your struggles, a reward for your faithfulness. don't give up. trust him." I just need to just pray through it all. keep calm and just work it out.

just before writing this post laken reminded me of why i love being a mother and why he is the best thing that has ever happened to me. while reading "love you forever" he just smiled and laughed when i'd sing... "i love you forever, i like you for always, as long as i'm living... my baby you'll be."

little things just have to bring you back to your sanity. oh the joys of being a mother. :) ...i wouldn't change a thing. not even the last 2 days!

i promise

Thursday, August 2, 2012

emily's story

this is a long overdue post. i wanted to post this a while back, but i still haven't gotten a chance to go take a picture for my blog... i decided to steal some pictures from her facebook instead.

this is emily's story. emily is a mother to a precious little boy named liam, i claim that he is the long lost strokes' member. he's extremely handsome. liam's daddy is the small town famous guitar strumming pro daniel aka d-nigs.
emily has been on an incredible journey through losing her baby weight and then some all the while taking care of her son and now she's started school to become a radiologist. she actually is part of my inspiration to wanting to change my body. about a month ago i asked her if she'd like to share her story through a couple questions i ask on my blog. she was delighted. here goes:

emily's story

the Pro's and Con's of Parenting
Pro’s of parenting:
-Having the pleasure of teaching your child… teaching them about the world around them, how to talk, walk, read, write and heavier things like morals/values & manners.
-Being an outsider, watching my son grow has been a wonderful experience; he is always surprising me with his common sense and all the new things that he has learned from someone somewhere. They really are sponges, he remembers everything. I’m proud to be his mom.
-Being able to know unconditional love.

Con’s of parenting:
-No matter what you instill in your children they will always find their own way. Parents will always feel responsible for both “failure” and “success”.
-The stress you get from people judging you, wanting you to do something differently or saying “I would do it this way”—All of us mothers are trying to do the BEST we can, with what we got..its called MOTHERLY INSTINCTS and THIS momma knows best for Liam.

how did you feel about your body after you had Liam?
Honestly, after giving birth I felt skinny again because I had just lost that huge hard belly I had been waddling around with for a few months. After spending the first days with Liam I actually felt that my body was not just MY body anymore, because I breastfed and all the changes that my body went through were all because of my little Liam. I felt amazing and humbled that my body could produce, deliver, and nourish an infant. It wasn’t until after I stopped breastfeeding that my mushy belly and stretch marks started to annoy me.

what was your turning point when you decided you wanted to make a change to your lifestyle?
Let me just say that I did not realize how big I was getting, I was an emotional eater. I started noticing that in pictures I was getting bigger from every which way AFTER I had already lost a big chunk of pregnancy weight. I tried to exercise here & there but was not giving it 100% because I still was eating horribly. In October 2011 Liam turned ONE and I thought…Wow it has been a whole year since I’ve given birth and have not even tried to get back into shape. I went through a lot of stuff during my WHOLE 41 week pregnancy and even the whole year after Liam was born, I was depressed, resentful, and angry most of the time. I had a lot of problems with different people because of what I had gone through. Instead of focusing on them any longer, I decided I needed to work on myself. I decided to TRY to diet & exercise regularly, despite the fact that I hated the thought of diets and restrictions I was desperate. After reaping the benefits of my plan, I tried to really stick to eating healthy and working out and I keep trying to reach my goals. Even if I have a bad week or month of completely falling off I always return to my original plan, with the same enthusiasm.

did you set a goal? or did you just try to see what happened?
In September 2011 I bought a measuring tape and wrote down all of my measurements in the places I wanted to shrink (..although I didn’t do anything about it until November). I always had a goal in mind, I needed to see the changes in more ways than one for me to even consider giving up some bread and sugar. Next to my measurements I wrote down what I’d like the numbers to be at some point in time. My weight goal was to weigh 115, I stagger between 118 & 120(imSOclose!). Another one of my goals was to be able to run a straight mile without stopping and without dying. I have accomplished that one goal and am proud. I never set a time limit because I did not want to be discouraged, I saw the results of my hard work. It’s a journey not a marathon.

what inspires you?
People inspire me. My mother is 42 years old, she can run circles around me. Real people inspire me I have found some awesome women on the internet who have helped me lose and stay motivated. People on my Facebook page who are young mothers, or just girls/women in general, my friends and acquaintances who are trying to get healthy and fit truly inspire me and I inspire them. I think everyone should put some effort into being HEALTHY especially if they are parents.

whats your favorite dish?
My favorite dish would be my tilapia. I sauté onions, tomatoes, and mushrooms in a skillet with olive oil & garlin and then add the tilapia, I scoop some of the vegetables off, pour it on top of the fish, cover the pan & let it steam for about 10 minutes. It is so delicious and I don’t even like to eat fish THAT much, but it has so many healthy benefits.

what's your favorite thing to do in the gym?
I go to Solid Fitness gym and it is more for classes than machines. So my favorite thing to do at the gym is my BOOT CAMP class, it’s never easy, always challenging, and it makes me feel awesome afterwards. I have come to know strength I never knew I had.

what's one memory as a mother you'll hold on to forever?
The one memory that I will hold on to forever as a mother is the moment a nurse handed me my baby boy and he & I locked eyes and just stared at each other, he was so alert. I could cry just thinking about it.

is there anything you'd do differently?
I was going to say that I wish I would have started changing my lifestyle earlier, but I don’t need to be hard on myself I’m finally comfortable in my own skin and that’s all that matters. I wouldn’t change one thing.